Thanksgiving Follow-up

I'm very proud of myself for how I handled the holiday. I went to one of my very good friend's house for Thanksgiving this year. Hubby and I both did. It was the first time ever that I was not the one hosting everyone and doing all the work. At first, I wasn't sure I was so happy about that. But it turned out to be just wonderful. I got to meet her family and I loved them all.

I did get to cook a little. I made my super yummy pumpkin bread, hummus and veggies, and I attempted my sweet potato chips. That last one didn't go so well. Our deep fryer wouldn't get hot enough so the grease was just soaking into the potatoes. Yuck. So I pulled out a pot and tried to do it stove top but ran out of time. Then after I finally gave up and started getting ready to leave, I realized the house stunk like hot grease. I hate that smell. So I grabbed another pot and filled it with water and vinegar to boil for the nasty smell. I turned the burner on high and headed to the bathroom to do my hair and makeup. A few minutes later, Hubby called from the kitchen "Oh SHIT". What happened, I asked? I came out of the bathroom to a cloud of smoke. Turns out, I turned the oil back on instead of the vinegar water. Yes, I tried to burn down my house on Thanksgiving. I got it all cleaned up and the smell taken care of. All is well in the world again.

I had planned ahead of time that Thanksgiving and the day after would be free days for me. That means that I wouldn't have to track calories or exercise or anything. It was freedom to do what I wanted guilt free. Early in the week, I was thinking about the freedom and realized that I didn't even want it. I really just wanted to keep doing what I was doing and not slow down or stop for any amount of time because I'm feeling so good. So, I figured out my week's calories in and out ahead of time and realized that I could eat as much as 2,500 calories both days and still be fine for the week with my normal exercise. I didn't think I would even come close to that but it was really freeing to feel like I had plenty of wriggle room if I did want it.

I ended up at 1,700 calories on Thanksgiving and 1,800 on Friday. My normal calorie intake is 1,400. I did go to the gym on Thanksgiving but did not go Friday. So, all I have to do is hit the gym today and stick to my 1,400 calories and I should be in for a good weigh in tomorrow.

Yesterday, I made us some turkey sandwiches for dinner then we went to Dairy Queen and got a blizzard for desert. I haven't done that in years so I thought "what the hell". The nostalgia of it was nice but...I had a couple problems with it. First of all, the ice cream they serve is crap. I should have just made my own ice cream for a treat. Secondly, I did not like how it made my stomach feel. I didn't get an upset stomach or anything. I felt fine for the most part. But I realized that after I was done with my 1/2 a small blizzard, I was feeling heavy and lethargic. My belly felt like I had swallowed a rock. I just wanted to shove a hose down my throat and flush it out.

That experience, although a little disappointing was a huge turning point for me too. Because I've been eating so very very healthy for the past few months and I've been really enjoying it rather than dreading it like I have in the past, I realized that I am NOT missing anything. After eating that "ice cream" last night, I started thinking about all the garbage food I use to eat and love. I use to love McDonald's french fries. I use to love Jack in the Box egg rolls. I use to love milk shakes. I use to love pizza. Okay, I still love pizza but only the really really good stuff (not the fast food delivery in the yellow pages). My life doesn't have to be one of deprivation from food or food related experiences. I don't have to refuse myself treats. I don't have to say "sorry, I can't have that". I have been able to eat a truly healthful and balanced diet and enjoy it while allowing myself real treats here and there. What I use to view as treats is nothing more than shit wrapped in sugar and grease. That is so not worth it. I just don't like how it feels in my body.

I no longer feel like a slave to the scale. I no longer feel like I just have to figure out a way to control everything. My diet, my exercise, my husband's diet, etc. I no longer feel like I'm in a little food prison. I no longer feel like the things I need to do to be healthy are chores. I no longer feel like I just need to figure out how to find and harness the willpower to make it through one more week.

I feel free. I feel happy. I feel proud. I feel thankful. I feel changed. I feel good.

Did you have any eye-opening experiences during the holiday?